# iced;

Monday, October 08, 2007

torn into pieces, 2:06 PM

i had a fruitful conversation with Yazid last night. and yes! Yazid, my primary schoolmate who sat beside me during Malay class. and he is my girlfriend's bf now. the world is just too small. having him to give me a buzz was unexpected. he made me see things in a different perspective, out of my comfort zone and beyond my capacity of thinking like thinking out of the box. thats the thing i enjoy talking to smart people. they are always full of brilliant ideas. never stop thinking. always in full speed to problem solving and thus, never give up easily. and i just sit back and enjoying every conversation. however, no offence please.

so tell me. is that it? you love someone and open yourself and feel so vulnerable, you let them in and they became really important to you and then, they can just do anything to you as they wish. walk away, hurt you, lie to you, shout at you, treat you like a dog. and there's nothing you can do about it? is that what love's is about?

i just have to say this. this Ramadhan is the worst one for me and so is the coming Syawal. yes true enough i shouldnt be saying this as this may just be my last one or even your last one. sit back and look at it.

it got me thinking how i find the strength to put up with him. my friends were amazed and im just as amazed. being stronger each day to face him. just as when he shouted at me, i swallowed it hard. and even without him apologising, i still could forgive him. jusAt DO NOT make me hate you and the whole you. you know very well what im like when hatred flowing in my bloodstream. i will never forgive you ever even if you come begging. but, even how much i say i wont forgive you, i always ended up forgiving you no matter how sore i can be because of you. and i hate myself for being that. dammit!

it hurts.

Be in good health first and foremost.. Weigh ermm at least a 40kg.. To do an adv diploma in nursing.. Be an excellent & dedicated perioperative nurse. I want to canoe & rock climbing someday.. To get married! Haha.. Not so soon still..

abby.
adee.
adi.
afdlin shauki.
azlina.
aznita.
azuwa.
belinda.
dani.
dila.
dina.
eileen.
farain.
farhana.
fauzie.
hasan.
hidayah.
huzaifah.
janna.
kak ayu.
kak azrina.
kak khatijah.
maliza.
mardia.
maria.
mastura.
mingyu.
mira.
nafisah.
neng.
nuraini.
sahara.
shafique.
shahida.
shu.
sufie.
sufian.
uma.
valerie.
winny.

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