# iced;

Friday, November 21, 2008

torn into pieces, 10:01 PM

its finally FRIDAY!! i am damn tired!! whenever i got home, washed up, eat and prayed, i sleep straight away. the bed is so comfortable that i can't even pick up my ringing phone. i thought i was the only one feeling this way but, many of us felt the same way.

anyway, we were so short of staff that even the Sisters have to help send patients back to the wards. as for me, i have to cover 2 theatres today. our last case today finished at 1830hrs and it wasn't an easy case. its a harder time for me as my scrub nurse is a month old scrub nurse and i have to standby her. at any point of the time ifthe surgeons decided to open up the sugery instead of laparoscopic, i have to scrub in. so, there i was praying.. please don't open don't open.. kerja besar!

this particular staff have scrub with me once and today is her first single scrub of the same operation. i am confident that she can go on alone but apparently, her preceptor claimed that she wasn't very confident she could do it alone. this recalls when i was a month old scrub nurse. one time double scrub, the next scrub, you do it alone whether or not you're confident enough. that's how all of learnt. so what if we got scolded or shouted at or was given sarcastic remarks. honestly, i went through all that and i am not afraid to show the same surgeon that hey, i know my stuff this time and i can anticipate better just as you see.

well, for a new comer, she is good. the only flaws is, her speed is not there yet so is the anticipation. but, i believe all those will come by as she goes on.

i don't want to take anymore juniors please. i am not good at teaching juniors plus, i have no patience. i am very proud of all preceptors who is willing to teach and guide the new ones with patience. =) i seriously can't. maybe one day but, not now. i started sounding like Angie already... in order to be a good scrub nurse you must................. you cannot let the surgeon lose confident........... you must this must that.. must know your anatomy so you can anticipate better... you must make sure.... haiyoh!!

nevertheless, if they ask me anything, i make sure i try to help as much as i can. i am still learning just like everyone else.

Angie told Professor about my dreams to be a cardio nurse one day. dammit! Prof said, 'is she sure? cardio is not easy you know. but, if she survive and get out of the hospital, she will be in great demand though.' i like the term great demand so that i can state my price. its like, 'hey, i can scrub for cabg or open heart surgery. how much are you going to pay me??' hahaa. open heart surgery is the one thing i want to do before i leave my operating theatre life. open heart surgery.... hmm.. not easy. but, i still want to do this irregardless.

good night you all.

it hurts.

Be in good health first and foremost.. Weigh ermm at least a 40kg.. To do an adv diploma in nursing.. Be an excellent & dedicated perioperative nurse. I want to canoe & rock climbing someday.. To get married! Haha.. Not so soon still..

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