this is got to be a fast one because i've got to move it move it..
i had a great time with my favourite girls yesterday. with the upcoming event, it feels different. Farz for instance, will be moving on to the next level soon and another level when she gets pregnant. Sufie will be moving on to the next level as well in probably 2 years time. i told Ain not to get married before i do please. same goes to Mardia, Yazid and Ahmad. the rest, nak kahwin ke tak nak ke... suka hati.
Ahmad is seeing someone. Hasan is already with someone. the man who is now many many many phase ahead of me. i am happy for you. =)
Farz was commenting, 'yelah.. jadi kau tak kesunyian.' i was smiling. my heart was laughing. i see the importance of a partner for life. Sufie introduced me 'ta'ruf' last year. i may be going through ta'ruf. i do not know. if it works for me, you'll receive my wedding invitation. if it doesn't then, it will be later on.
i asked her about him. i don't usually ask many questions like that especially when i am not in the mood to. i come to a point where i realised that i should be seeing someone new. serious matter. if it works out, well good. if it doesn't, i am not putting hopes in the first place. i am excited and probably happy yet sad to meet someone new... you know those feelings.. =) life goes on.
after all, it's been more than a year now.
i learn something lately.. A good friend is someone you respect, cherish, love, open to, understands and knows what is on your mind even before you opens your mouth, not someone you compete with. definitely not someone you compete with.
i've lost a friend more than a year ago. he is too far from my reach. no matter how hard i tried, he is not coming back. whatever it is, i am happy if he is. sometimes, when we treasure someone too much, we just got to let it go. the word is let it go. however, if he returns one day, i'll kneel and bow to God. i can't afford losing another friend. i hate when friendship goes haywire. BUT, i did my best. i can't. i really can't stoop any lower. i am so sorry. it takes 2 to straighten things. i can't do this anymore. i am so tired to give in anymore.
